Dear Reader,
It’s a hot afternoon in May and I’m teaching a group of university students online. I’ve already been teaching them for a few months.
Faces fill the screen but one square only has a patch of blue sky. After a few minutes the sky disappears and there’s now a face. Let’s call him John.
“Great to have you back, John!” I smile. “What happened?”
“Er, yeah, Miss, I got the time of the class mixed up and I’m still out on my boat but I’m almost home, now.”
Give him credit, he does look bashful about this. I see lots of people laughing.
“Ah, I get it. Well, it’s great you’ve still joined us from your boat, and it’s a good reminder of the time the class is on, so that next week you can get your boat trip in before class, yes?” I’m joking but John gets my drift and I see him nodding.
In another online class there’s a disappearance by Jo (and you’ve guessed it, he wasn’t called Jo), who returns a few minutes later.
“Jo, everything okay? You disappeared, there?”
“Yeah, our cleaner’s in and I just needed to tidy my bathroom before she gets up here. Sorry about that, Miss.”
His classmates think this is hilarious. Some are throwing their heads back they’re laughing so hard.
Again, I used humour, thanking him for not turning up toilet brush in hand and asking if he could take a closer look at his schedule to make sure that the clash of cleaner and class didn’t happen again.
It can be tricky managing boundaries, can’t it? You want to protect the relationship but also communicate when someone’s bumping into these boundaries.
Was I pissed off at these students? Yes, a little. I mean I’d carefully managed my schedule to make sure my boating and toilet cleaning weren’t getting in the way of teaching, but I could also see the funny side, and I knew that these students actively took part in class, and we had good rapport.
And all of that meant that I could have a joke with them, at the same time as make it clear “please, don’t do this again.”
Expectations, boundaries and feedback are delicate but big subjects.
In the 1500 sessions I’ve coached, these three topics come up a surprising number of times.
They’re raised by those early on in their career, by those who are new to managing a team, and you might be surprised to know, from those who are senior and have been around the block a few times.
Because when you can give feedback in a clear, supportive and co-operative way it makes communication easier, protects the relationship and nips little problems in the bud before they become huge problems.
If you’re looking to boost your skills in this area, and feel better and do better when you manage expectations, boundaries and feedback, drop me a line.
See you next time,
Mica
P.S. Ever wondered what it’s like to work with me? For a limited time, I’m offering a few FREE slots that are special taster sessions. In this 15 minute online session I share with you how to be a better storyteller. You get to practice a short, fun exercise and get my feedback. Interested? Book your slot here.
Copyright @ Mica Allan Consulting, 2025
Work with me: Mica Allan Consulting
LinkedIn: Mica Allan
Email me: Mica Allan
Unsubscribe · Preferences
